Hannah time

The red carpet is being laid out, the champagne is on ice and Andy has cleaned his dinner jacket. Why all the preperations? Why my friend Hannah is coming to visit.

Lady like Hannah

The first of my friends is coming to visit me from Britain. Its all very exciting. She's bringing me chocolate.

What are we going to do while she's here? Well that would be telling (that's right, I have no idea) but it will be fun and show Vancouver at its best. We'll probably give the Royal a miss... And avoid all the peep show places on Granville.

This week I've been mostly saving money as I'm taking some time off for Hannah's visit. Though I went nuts today and bought a Frisbee. A proper one too which I'm sure Lew will be pleased about. I picked up my tax form as well which is going to be fun to complete. Apparently it takes around 2 hours to do. Urgh. Still, seeing as Simon got more money than he actually asked for back it'll be worth doing.

Lastly Happy Mother's Day to all the mums out there (British ones only as its only the British Mother's Day) but especially to my own dear mum. And to Mrs Banks as well as I know Paul hasn't sent you a card. Tch, some mother's indeed do have them.

I know, I'll use Science

On Sunday I decided to get out of the sunshine (I mean, its not like its rare in Vancouver or anything) and visit on of the City's fine museums. Science World to be exact.

Welcome my friends... To the World Of Science!

Accompanying me on this journey of discovery was Jade. I hoped by the end of the day to understand exactly how rainbows were made and how much I could carry if I was an ant. Serious Science questions.

It was great fun, with loads of interactive bits and bobs for children 'of all ages'. I say all ages and Jade and me did nothing but run around playing with everything, pushing children of young age out of the way to have a go. Sadly I didn't really learn anything. In their rush not to bore the kiddies the museum, or 'World', seemed to have forgotten to educate them as well. Still, we enjoyed ourselves.

Jade taking her time on solving a puzzle. The 5 year old to her left was given strict instructions not to give her any help. I tried as well. It was only after 5 minutes that we realised that it was impossible to solve as a piece was missing. Hey hum.

Ian in a Box, the toy every kid will want next Christmas. Yes, I did almost put my hip out. And yes, I am turning into Gollum.

There was one very exciting moment when I was shooting a target with a 'rifle'. Obviously it wasn't a real rifle and the point was something to do with stress (you saw how much your aim moved about while shooting) but you had to cock it and you aimed at a bullseye. You had two shots and the record score was 19.6. I got a perfect ten with my first shot but Jade's excited squeal and the gathering crowd put me out of sorts, so I scored a disappointing 7 with my second shot.

I only hope I can keep my nerve with shooting zombie heads off in the inevitable zombie apocalypse.

We also saw a mini film called bugs about a butterfly and a preying mantis in the Imax cinema they have there which was cool. I think you were supposed to be on the butterfly's side but I missheard Dame Judi Dench (she was narrating) and thought the Mantis was called Roger. After that I couldn't help but root for the little guy. Even as he ate the butterfly at the end.

Science is fun!

Relatively interesting thing that makes Canada different to the Uk #2

They have black squirrels here.

Grey and red I've heard of but I have never heard black squirrels. Yet they're everywhere here. Its taken my 5 months but I finally got a photo of one of them.

They also breath fire and can kill a man just by looking at him

Wow, how different Canada is to Britain.

Into the wilderness

I'm sure you're all aware Andy went for a trip US of Stateside last week. He returned Wednesday with a cowboy hat and a love of guns. He hasn't changed a bit. It struck me that his time in New Mexico was probably the most time we've spent apart since he went on holiday to Spain back in Britain (if that makes sense) in the middle of 2005. How strange to think that.

I could of done with longer.

Of course I'm joking (or am I? OR am I? OR AM I? Yes) and it was good to have Vancouver and London's finest green crayon impersonator back. On Saturday it was such a nice day we decided to have a wander around Stanley Park. Now we've done the sea walk a few times now but I we'd never explored the trails in the park.

They were amazing, for much of it you felt like you were in the middle of the country side. You couldn't hear any city sounds and occasionally got a glimpse of the sea. Fantastic.

Obligatory photo of beach in sun

Massive tree named 'Redus Bullus' after its discoverer. Really, look how damn big it is.

Look at this, we could be somewhere warm or something

It was a great day spent in the sun. In the evening I saw the excellent 'Tristram Shandy: A Cock and Bull Story', Steve Coogan's first good film. Yes, its better than the Parole Officer.

Green, green and more green

Now maybe I just have never really noticed but in the UK most people don't really celebrate St Patrick's Day do they? Of course the pubs might do a special on Guinness, and I think there's even a parade in London now (or did they never go ahead with that? Help please British Chimpers correspondents). But its still pretty low key.

This is not the case in Canada.

My first clue was leaving the flat in the morning. Andy's lady friend, an American, said 'Just to warn you, in the states if you don't wear green on St Patrick's day people can pinch you'. I wasn't wearing any green. I was slightly alarmed by this but I thought that this was Canada, not the US. They have retained at least some British good sense.

When I got to UBC I noticed that practically every student was wearing green. I got to my office and nearly every worker was wearing green. I started to feel slightly out of place. The only thing that reassured me was the Irish lady I work with being bewildered by it all as well (though she was wearing green, obviously to be on the safe side). I opened my emails and found an invite to the office St. Patrick's Day party in the afternoon, with food, green drink and prizes for best outfit... Again, just to point out, I wasn't wearing any green.

The whole day was a series of 'Top of the mornin' to yah's and 'Yes my great uncle was half irish's. Also everyone kept asking why I wasn't green. I ended up making a badge out of paper clip and a green bottle top just to stop the accusing stares. But this only led to people wanting to read what it said on my badge (it said 'If this button is depressed before opening then do not drink'). I didn't win the prize for best outfit. Though people admired my ingenuity.

I got home glad to to be away from the madness. 'A nice quiet pint in our wee local would suite me down to the ground' I thought. I then started to get messages from people saying how there were queues outside practically every bar in Downtown. We decided to head out early just in case. The Kings Head turned out to be heaving. We had to queue to get in unbelievably. Granted it was only for 5 minutes but we had never seen anything like it.

The thing about busy bars, the thing I've found anyway, is that you tend to drink silly amounts very quickly. Guess its the standing up that does it. Coupled with the fact that despite my old man moanings the atmosphere inside the pub was infectious. You couldn't help get carried away with it all. So we all had a fair few and enjoyed ourselves.

Things got a bit blurry as the night wore on. Can you see Wally?

Gavin enjoying his traditional Irish pint of Kokenee larger

The only problem was Chris, Liz, Jade, Hannah and co had arrived late and so were queuing outside still. It became obvious that they were never going to get in so we decided to leave the pub, get some booze on the way home and head to Si, Chris, Keeny and Liz's. Or at least I did as apparently I'm sure I asked them if that was ok, but they don't remember. I must admit my own memory of the walk there is hazy. I think Simon tried to give me a piggy bank at one point but I could of dreamt that.

Still I remember people having a good time. Two random 17 year old girls turned up which was a bit strange. I also remember giving Chris a big hug.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

The only consolation was Simon was worse than I was. Bet he doesn't remember this picture.

Kodak moment

Look at this, isn't it amazing? The Sunday before last (no, not last Sunday, the one before that) Jade and myself went for a walk along English Bay. Ignore the wind and the fact everyone was wearing coats (except me who as a typical English man saw the sun and decided that a jumper would be more than enough to protect me from the wind of the pacific) and it could of been summer. Day turned into dusk and the sun slowly set.

Man I love this city.

What where they thinking?

Last weekend it was of course Oscar night. Now I've never been that bothered about the Oscars. Maybe its because they're show at stupid o'clock in Britain, but I've never really paid much attention or bothered to watch them. A couple of weeks ago though my friend Hannah (Real Hannah not British Hannah, or Aussie Hannah not Real Hannah, depends which one I want to annoy) asked if she could watch the Oscar's at our place, as her house don't have a TV. I made some vaguely positive comments then forgot about it. A few days before the Sunday I was round Si, Keenie, Liz and Chris' place (really got to think of a collective name). Someone mentioned how it would be cool to have an Oscar's party and dress up. Before you could say 'Probably should check with Andy first' I had volunteered our place.

Now our flat is little bigger than a postage stamp but what the hell I thought, surely I don't know that many people...

Why do I like these photos so much?

We had 13 people in our living room. It sometimes feels a bit cosy with just Andy and me so it was pretty intense. It was great fun though, especially as most of us had dressed up (as Paul pointed out in his blog, only the non-Brits didn't make the effort, tut). I don't really remember much about the Oscars. In fact I don't remember much about the evening full stop as, ah, red wine was consumed in rather copious amounts. We didn't have any dinner either as the Oscars started at 5pm. So it got quite merry in the end to say the least.

Oh-oh, its the half windsor mafia

Damn tabloids get everywhere, 'The orange juice I was drinking simply reacted badly with some pain killers I had taken earlier. The picture clearly shows me being helped up by my two Australian interns, Hannah and Jade. To suggest anything improper is typical of the gutter press in this country'.

By putting on glasses Jade is immediately singled out as a Nerd and so attacked by the local bully with a giant pink crayon.

Maybe I'll hold another Oscars Party in Britain, though it would have to take place at 2 in the morning or whatever. A party... OF THE NIGHT.

It was a good party. A very good party...

Hi Ian

The Wednesday before last Andy, Hannah, Jilly and myself went to see Ben Lee at Richards on Richards. He's an Aussie singer who I have seen in Vancouver once before. He was great though I know many Aussie's don't like him because they see him as being very... mawkish is probably the best word. I can sort of see what they mean but from my point of view he sings catchy, cheerful, happy songs. Its not what you want all the time but sometimes its good to hear something that leaves a smile on your face. Especially in the Post 9-11 world.

Anyway, I had a great time and at the end of the gig bought a CD which was signed by the man himself (whose hand I shook... I've washed it since though). Well I say signed, more he just wrote on it...

Oh, hi Ben

Yeah, not actually his signature. In fact I could of just wrote on it with pen, no one would be the wiser. Still I know the truth. That's the main thing.

Its been a long time

Well its been one hell of a gap between posts, probably my longest one since doing the blog properly. Apologies to all, I know many of you rely on me to brighten up your dull days at work. Its a burden I carry and take seriously.

Sorry.

Well whats happened? Lots and nothing, bizarrely at the same time. I've not done much since my last post, what I have done I've put as separate posts above. I'm bumbling along as ever. On Monday I'm off to the Dept of Computer Science back at the main campus for a new temp position. I didn't mind working in Downtown but being back at the main campus means I'll be able to go swimming. I've got to start working on the abbs for the summer of course.

In terms of gossip then its been a mental few weeks, but I do not wish for Chimpers to descend into tawdry gossip. Chimpers is the broadsheet of blogs, not the tabloid.

But oooooh boy has it been crazy.

Andy is away at the moment, in New Mexico with his lady and her parents. Not sure what they'll make of him but he's promised Laura to be on his best behaviour. Despite in theory having the flat to myself I've not had one evening alone so far. Simon came over Monday night, Jade and Hannah Tuesday night, and travelling BUNACer Bagpipes and his mate Matt have been staying with me since Wednesday night. On top of this Andy's called me 3 times.

I suspect people think I can't cope.

Anyway, how are the rest of you?